I am
by me myself and ink
Summary: I am faster than sound, faster than sight, I am the sun that always shines at night. And I am the laughter that rings with bells, And I am the fear that never dwells. wally's feelings on his secret identity kid flash and his uncle. T because im paranoid.


**Sup. im new :). Sort of. Maybe. I have two stories, one is discontinued, and a oneshot for YJ so I guess im not really new, I just haven't written anything designed to appeal to others and not just myself and my crummy writing style, so im not quite sure how this is going to turn out.. This is just something I had running around in my head. I have a different version of this story out for the justice league cartoon if you like that too. (although, im posting this before I post that one so if you go looking and its not there, just check back again in like 10 minutes. And sorry its so short. Im not really good at long oneshotts.**

**I am.**

The truth was so, so simple. But it was so far away. Wally wasn't sure if he'd ever be able to reach it. it was simply spoken words, ones that could be seen in everyone's eyes, but no one ever tru6y knows what to say. Because Wally is Wally. He smiles and he laughs and he jokes. Without that, everyone would probably lose their minds. Dry humor and a few drinks can only go so far as to hold sanity over the things they've seen.

_I __am the fool that no one ever sees,  
>I am the false hope that everyone believes.<em>

No one can just _say _it. and Wally can't bring himself to just believe what he knows is true because no one has had the courage to just say it to his face. And Wally just can't _stand _it anymore. There have always been moments, hours, or even days when he could break away from those looks, where he could smile and everyone would look at him and see only him and no one else. But no one is looking at him like that now. All the others see him just like everyone always does. Weather they mean it or not but they all have set destinations. They all have places set before them in their own right and not as anyone else. but Wally is running wild. With a path carved out through the maze of time already prepared for him directions and all, he is twisting and turning and winding his way through the endless pathways, going anywhere but where the signs point in hopes of leading his own legacy.

_I am the joker in the deck of false cards,  
>I am the beat of all lost hearts left to guard.<em>

But Wally is always smiling. He's forgotten how to not smile. He sees the sparkle in there eyes and his grin grows that much bigger because if he doesn't smile then he has nothing left. Because that's how he was made to be. Molded from birth and up till the end of every second. He was born to smile. And if he stops, he won't have the hope the smile gives him. He won't have the strength to stand up tall under all there stares and keep on living. And he's not sure if the others will either. They are all so serious, so distraught, that they would tear themselves apart from the inside out if they could no longer see the flash of his teeth, or the turn of his lips, or the shining in his eyes that light up like the fourth of July. They wouldn't survive a single minute with themselves if there was not someone smiling, if only to make others smile.

_I am the lightning of a man made storm,  
>I am the light in which dreams are born.<em>

But Wally is holding back. Because sometimes he doesn't care what others think. Sometimes he sees the look they all give him when they won't just lay it out in the open. Because sometimes he sees those looks, and the only thing that he can do to not lose his smile to anger, to not let himself slip, is to run. he will run and run and run until even he himself is panting for air. He will run until he can find his mind, until he can find the sun. because he can't let himself go. He can't drop who he was molded to be. So he learns and adapts and struggles up to the mountain top he knows he will never reach, and then runs right back to keep smiling for his friends.

_I am faster than sound, faster than sight,  
>I am the sun that always shines at night.<em>

And then everything is how it was built up to be. Wally is where he was supposed to be. Or where he was told to believe he belonged. But Wally knows that's not true. He knows he's not supposed to be here. It's the same looks he's been getting since the beginning and not a _single _person will just stop trying to trick him, trying to make him believe, and say what wall needs to here. Here what they all believe to be true. And until then, Wally cant be free. He won't be able to smile because he genially wants to. If someone doesn't tell him, he will never be able to find those precious roots, the ones that will let him be who he wants in the darkness or in the light, the ones that will make him see that he doesn't have to be something he's not. That he doesn't have to run all the time.

_I am the lost sole that remains found,  
>I am the moon that is made of the ground.<em>

Wally can see it in everything he does. He can see it in the mirror every time he looks. He can see it in the reflections of his friends actions. He can see it in the light in the raindrops as they fall before his eyes. He cant hold on that much longer. he's already losing grip. His smile is small and forced. His eyes don't twinkly like the stars are reflected through the green orbs like crystal. He can see that its affecting the others. He can see that his lose is also there's. they look to him for light. They look to him for the warmth that the fire spreads in the coldest of nights. but the lack of brightness, the lack of the twinkle in the corners of his eyes are all that they see now. they don't see him, they don't see what they used to with those _looks_ of knowing. They don't see the source of happiness. They only see the flickering flame in his eyes that will soon be blown out.

_I am the feathered weight of your thoughts.  
>I am the pain of joy that is always sought.<em>

There is something else in there eyes now. something even he cant decipher. But that look that's been there from the beginning is still there. Its hidden just below the surface of the new emotions that dance across their faces. They see Wally, but they don't. they see what he used to be, who he is, but they realize that that was never _Wally_. They see the fading fire that he once was, but they also see who he is. They see his need to run. they see his lack of roots. They _see _him now. they truly do, and they know what needs to be said. They know what he needs them to say, to here. But they can never bring themselves to do it. because they know what will happen when they do.

_I am the sweet nectar that tastes so stale,  
>I am the sour apple that shines farewell.<em>

And Wally is done. He's done waiting for them to admit. He's done waiting for everyone to say it. he's waited long enough and he's not waiting anymore. His flame has flickered out, blown out by all there eyes. But he can't here it from just anyone. Not anymore. He needs to here it from the one person it matters most. The man Wally believed to be his true guardian. The one who taught him how to burn, how to be a fire and not just a single flame. the one man who would never tell him what he wanted to here. But Wally was done. And he had gotten the truth

"you'll never be as good as me."

_I am the wind entangled thought the days,  
>I am the breath that has been taken away. <em>

And wally could only smile as the whispered words left the sullen lips of the elder man born from lighting. And he smiled not because he needed to for others, but because he wanted to. Because it took more of an effort to keep the corner of his lips down, than to let them rise. and he ran, not because he needed to. But because it felt so free. Because it felt so right. He ran across the ocean, the ripples forming waves as they spread throughout the glassy surface. He ran to the tallest mountain peeks because he could make it through the snow. And he ran as long as he could. Because Wally could breath. he could laugh and mean it. he could finally _feel _that twinkle in his eyes again. and Wally could finally smile again and it not be for anyone but himself. because wally was finally free.

_And I am the laughter that rings with bells,  
>And I am the fear that never dwells.<em>

**.::~)the end(~::.**

**I hope you guys liked it. I really don't have anything else to say except that JL version of this I told you about at the beginning might not be out till tomorrow. So thanks for reading, and I leave you with one final parting word. Meh.**


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